Countdown

I'll be moving to a tiny town in Northeastern New Mexico to start my first 'real' job in early- to mid-January. Now that the pressure of hunting for a job and the stress of not having an income is finally almost over, I've been more than a little annoyed to find myself just as listless, un-energetic, and over-whelmed as when I was waiting to hear if I'd been invited to interview at a site or offered a position.

As I mentioned in my first post, Anchorless, I'm no stranger to moving, especially over the past few years. Aside from getting over my initial disappointment regarding leaving New York, I have actually enjoyed my time in so many different places. In hindsight, one of the reasons this period of my life has been fun as opposed to a collosal pain-in-the-ass was because I had support systems in every area in which I spent time. The primary stressor was being under- or unemployed, and my friends and family have been more than supportive when it came to helping me during this (thank God) relatively short period of joblessness. In a way, not having a lease and, at least for the last three-and-a-half months, a job has allowed me to have incredible freedom when it came to traveling, be it for interviews of for pleasure.


In a way I guess knowing where I'm to land opens up a new set of questions and anxieties. Now instead of worrying about finding employment, I get to move on to a set of different, more positive set of concerns, such as: Where will I live? Since I will be in a town that requires that I have a car, how will I secure transportation? How long will it take me to orient to my new position? To learn the assessments I'll need to use in this new work setting? Will I like my colleagues? Will they like me? Will I be good at my job? Will I make enough money to make timely payments on student loans, credit cards, and the new financial commitments I'll have to make?

But more than anything, I wonder how difficult it will be to establish a social base in this new stage of my life.

For the first time in years I'm making a move where I will not know anybody socially. I haven't been faced with a move like this since I started graduate school. Even then, as there were five other people in the same cohort as myself, meeting new people was made easier by all of us being in Laramie for the same reason (to study psychology) and having limited support systems, thus being relatively open to making new friends. I made two very close friends in that cohort who I value and with whom I still spend time, even though it has been years since we have lived in the same town.

Moving as an adult, and by myself, will be different, I suspect. The people I met while interviewing seem nice and I expect to like them. However, I would like to have friends outside of my work. Small towns can be tricky places in which to establish new friendships. The tininess of the town can make it easy to meet people, but depending on long-standing friend- and family-ties, new people can have a difficult time eeking out spaces for themselves in the presence of relationships with such strong histories. And the fishbowl effect of living in a small town will probably be amplified when I'm the only new person entering the community and workspace, as opposed to a new set of students entering the same town/school at the same time.

So I've decided to be a little proactive regarding establishing a structure for filling my downtime to try to not equate being alone with being lonely, and to fill my time productively instead of moping around wishing for the good ol' days when I had a ready and accessible friendbase. Here are some things I think I could do to ease my social transition time... and I'm making it public as a means to hold myself accountable on the (likely) chance I find my self whining about being lonely and not trying to do anything about it.

• Take a cooking class (I've never learned the basics)
• In honor of the Southwest, learn to make a mean green chile
• Join a gym
• Start rock-climbing again
• Join or start a book club
• Perhaps try to teach (or even take) a class at the local community college
• Start writing real letters to friends and family (a dying art, in my mind)
• Volunteer... perhaps Big Sisters?
• Explore the neighboring towns of Taos and Santa Fe
• Explore the national forests of NE New Mexico
• Spend time mindfully organizing my house so it will truly be home, something I haven't really had in over two years
• Document my new town and surrounding areas with pictures
• Continue to blog
• Train for a half marathon (unless I'm accepted to the New York marathon... then train for that!)

Moving is a pretty common experience for most adults these days. People start over in new places, with new jobs, and with limited support systems all of the time. If you've found your way to this blog and post, I'd be curious to know what you did to make your new city or town your new home.